Thursday, June 24, 2010

The Run

Greetings and salutations, Beatdowners! It's a scorcher here in Baltimore today...99 degrees, high a little crotch-pot cookin' going on, and swampass is a guarantee...

So I'm going to run for Congress. No kidding. Well, I'm going to TRY to run for Congress...a few things have to fall in place, like getting enough signatures to even get on the ballot.

For those that know me well, you may think I'm being my usual bar stool comedian, doing my part to entertain the masses...and while I'm sure some of you are "LOL'ing" at the mere notion of Matt Stone running for an elected position on the national level, I'm as serious as serious can get.

So...why me? The better question is, WHY NOT ME? Hell, WHY NOT YOU?

The time has come for America to be America again. We were founded as a government OF THE PEOPLE, and BY THE PEOPLE. And there is no debate that can prove differently...I am one of THE PEOPLE.

I'm not rich. I'm not an attorney. The LAST thing I'd EVER want to be is a career politician. Eh. I don't even like that word. I want to be what everyone in DC SHOULD be - A REPRESENTATIVE.

That being said, I will run as an independent...maybe the head of my own party, The Representative Party.

It bothers me that the focus of all campaigns nowadays is more on whatever dirt opponents can dig up on one another...who smoked what, who drank, who had a little too much fun one night, who slept with's disgusting...and proof of where we have gone as a people. Therefore, I won't be doing ANY of that. And, I will refuse to speak of anything other than the issues...which to me are what the majority of people in US Congressional District 3 tell me their issues are.

I'll throw this out there about my personal life. I have some skeletons in the closet. Who doesn't???? I did okay in school, and didn't take it seriously until my last 2 years. I have a degree in Political Science, and have spent most of my professional career on the buying side of foodservice distribution. I'm as outside of the beltway as you can get.

I have never been the greatest husband, brother, son, friend, student, athelete, employee, or (possibly) father. I haven't been the greatest at anything, really. I've made some really piss-poor personal decisions in my life, and I've learned a lesson from each and every one of them...lessons I intend to instill in my children so they can be better men than I ever could have dreamed of being.

I've had a DUI (for which I received a Probation Before Judgement).

I've smoked marijuana in the past (OH, NO!).

I've made some REALLY bad decisions on personal relationships with some not-so-campaign-friendly individuals.

Truly, it is what it is.

Or I should say it is what it WAS.

My mistakes have made me who I am today, have helped me grow, and have made me open my eyes (and heart) to what matters most in the world; and, in all honesty, I can say I'm okay with the guy that is looking back at me in the mirror every day!!! My mistakes haven't been easily dismissed...I will carry some of them with me forever as my cross to bear. But again, they have all lead me to this point in my life, to this VERY moment...the moment when the past is (FINALLY) let go to be the past; when today is today; and, when tomorrow is a hope.

But, NONE of my personal short-comings make me a bad choice to represent the people in Congressional District 3.

Personal views on broad political topics...

The Two-Party system isn't working anymore.

Most of the people in office down in DC make me look like a Saint...they just know the right people and have enough money to bury their short-comings.

I think abortion is MORALLY wrong, and I do not think it should be used as a form of birth control. I believe life begins at conception. However, I do NOT think ANY government should tell a woman what she can and can't do with her body. It's a double-edged sword, in my mind. I believe the fetus is a life that deserves a chance. But I also believe that a law banning abortions across the board will lead to many more fatalities when young women make terrible decisions and seek out an abortion from someone who isn't qualified to perform one.

I am for healthcare reform. Healthcare should be available and affordable to EVERYONE. However, I'm opposed to Obamacare, especially how the plan was negotiated by democrats behind closed doors, even when the majority of the voting populace was opposed to the plan.

Immigration reform HAS to happen, and the illegal alien issue MUST be fixed. More security has to be put into place on the border to prevent illegals from entering our country. I carry the same beliefs as President Teddy Roosevelt conveyed in a letter he wrote in 1919, three days before his death...he said, "In the first place we should insist that if the immigrant who comes here in good faith becomes an American and assimilates himself to us, he shall be treated on an exact equality with everyone else, for it is an outrage to discriminate against any such man because of creed, or birthplace, or origin. But this is predicated upon the man's becoming in very fact an American, and nothing but an American. There can be no divided allegiance here. Any man who says he is an American, but something else also, isn't an American at all. We have room for but one flag, the American flag, and this excludes the red flag, which symbolizes all wars against liberty and civilization, just as much as it excludes any foreign flag of a nation to which we are hostile. We have room for but one language here, and that is the English language...and we have room for but one sole loyalty and that is a loyalty to the American people."

On education...our system is flawed. We should teach our children to be leaders in the world in all fields...mathematics, engineering, biology, physics, and the liberal arts. Quality education should be available to all children, and indeed, no child should be left behind. Schools should be SAFE learning environments, no matter where they are located.

On government's time to deliver a dose of reality. $0.40 of every dollar the US Federal government spends next year is going to have to be borrowed. Our country is being sold from under our feet to other nations around the world who are buying our debt. It's time to end this. And there are only 2 ways to do this, and BOTH are necessary. Taxes MUST increase...but in a fair and equal manner to all socio-economic classes. The middle class is vanishing at break-neck speed. The poor are getting more poor. There has to be a middle ground. Personally, I am a fan of a flat tax. As more and more people fall below the poverty line, and as the middle class evaporates, more and more government money goes into supporting those individuals. Socio-economic programs chew up a ton of the federal budget. It doesn't have to be that way. And on the flip side of tax increases, the government MUST cut spending. The notion of a "few hundred billion dollars between friends" doesn't work anymore. The reigns have to be drawn in. Will it be painful? Yes. Will it be a burden? Yes. But in my opinion, it is crucial for the longevity of our great nation.

On welfare...anyone receiving government assistance MUST undergo drug testing, and MUST go to self-help programs so they can get back into the workforce. This is a blanket statement and is for ALL.

On marijuana...legalize. Regulate. Tax.

That's a few of MY beliefs...but I am not considering this run for MY beliefs. I will be the voice of the majority for US Congressional District 3. That's what this is about. Giving the power back TO THE PEOPLE.

And that leads me here...a few campaign promises.

1. I will not sling mud against anyone I would be running matter what.
2. I will not take $1 from any political action committee. I will not take $1 from any lobbyist group. I will not take any contributions made by anyone who is trying to buy their way into DC.
3. I will not discuss my past personal shortcomings with anyone during the campaign. It's not about what mistakes I've made in the past. It's about who I am today, and wanting to speak for my district tomorrow. It's about making America "America" BY THE PEOPLE...ALL of the people...and not by crooked, dirty politics...not by PAC or lobbyist monies...
4. I will vote based on the majority opinion of my district. I will hold monthly "town hall" meetings IN MY DISTRICT (outside of the beltway) to get the majority opinion on upcoming bills to be voted on.
5. I will remain grassroots...I'm sure any contributions will be minimal, so I will utilize social media platforms, door-to-door campaigning, and be accessible to anyone in my district. And if I'd actually win, that wouldn't change.

Yes, this all sounds idealistic. I'm sure some people will laugh at this. If...and it's a HUGE if...IF I would qualify to be on the ballot, I'd be shocked if I actually won. I would be honored and serve my district to the best of my ability. I would serve a MAXIMUM of 2 terms. I would not make a career out of it.

But deep down, I'm more interested in making a's time for YOU to open YOUR eyes, and realize the folks in DC right now are NOT our boss. We are theirs. The people in DC are there to REPRESENT YOU...not their wallets, their friends, or their re-election bids.

Win or lose, that's the most important message...of the people, by the people.

See you all on the trail...any specific questions re: my views on anything can be left in the comments, and I will answer each and every one of them, to the best of my abilities.

Stay informed, Beatdowners...stand up and be's time to TRULY change the world!

Monday, June 7, 2010

A Whole Lotta Thoughts...

Greetings one and all, and welcome to your weekly beatdown....administered as always by your favorite bar-stool philosopher, your most spectacular giver of awesome ramblings that ever-so-carefully teeter the tightest of lines between genius and insanity...

And what a segue...

Albert Einstein had one of the greatest quotes of ALL time...he said:

"Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."

Ain't that the truth?!?!?!? And isn't it something we ALL are guilty of? We hold our patterns, we stay in our comfort zone, and when things go poorly, we complain, don't make the necessary change(s), and expect things to improve.

And isn't it SUPER easy to come up with 1,000,000 excuses why we WON'T make a change rather than making ONE adjustment to facilitate the necessary change?

Seriously...YOU - YES, YOU - have been there, done that. I'm as guilty as you. Keep doing things the same way and expecting things to be different THIS time around.

Almost 2 weeks into my new career, I'm realizing how f'd I've been in the head for a long time professionally! For 10 years I've stayed in a role expecting things to get better and change. Sure, the building changed, the company changed, the co-workers changed, but it was the SAME thing! How could I move forward when all I was doing was spinning in a circle? I couldn't...I was doing the same thing, expecting it to be better this time around...and I was ALWAYS wrong. Being in a new industry has made me realize this!

Work. Relationships. Friends. Habits. Voting. Getting away from the norm that you create in your own mind is friggin' HARD. If it was easy, it'd simply be "the way". But doing the same thing over and over and over again when the results are always shitty, and yet continually hoping/praying/believing things will be different is, as Mr. Einstein says, INSANE!

To rip from the Absolut Vodka commercial..."Doing things differently leads to something exceptional".

Stop making the same MISTAKE over and over thinking things will change...because as Biggie Smalls once said (R.I.P., B.I.G.), "We can't change the world unless we change ourselves".

Get out of the bad relationship once and for all. Look for a new job. Stop hanging around those assholes. And for God's Sake...VOTE FOR REAL CHANGE...B/C NONE OF THE CHANGE THAT WAS PROMISED HAS BEEN DELIVERED!

Yeah, a touch of a rant...but reading various Status Updates, watching the news, and listening to two older gentlemen bickering at the barber shop on Saturday got me a little fired up.

Some random thoughts to end this one...
1. HonFest in Baltimore this weekend (6/12 & 6/13) should be a hoot...and wouldn't you know that my brother's band is gonna rock that joint 80's style on Saturday!

2. The 100 calorie packs of Wholly Guacamole are ridiculously good...especially when you throw in a little Habanaro Sauce to kick things up a notch!

3. "Three Sheets with Zane Lamprey" on do I get a gig like that?!?!?!?

4. Don't you hate it when your neighbor's car alarm goes off late at night and it takes them 10 or 15 minutes to turn it off? Seriously, everyone can hear it...what exactly are you doing so that it takes you that long to push a freakin' button on your key?!?!?!?

5. When calculating averages, it looks as if the O's will finish the season with 45 wins and 117 losses...Mr. Angelos...DOING THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER AND EXPECTING DIFFERENT RESULTS IS INSANE...sell the team to someone that WANTS to put a winner on the field, please.

6. Only 98 more days 'til the RAVENS kick off their 2010 season (on Monday Night Football!!!) against the J-E-T-S. That one is gonna be a good ol' fashioned slobberknocker!

7. M.R. Ducks in Ocean City Maryland is calling my name...loudly. Can't wait to get back down there for a weekend in the next few weeks...

8. Rock, Paper, Scissors...what brainiac decided paper beats rock? I got an idea for that genius...let them stand with a piece of paper in front of their face and I'll chuck a rock at it...ROCK WINS.

9. Automatic doors make me feel like a Jedi.

10. Women of Facebook...enough with the DuckFace/KissyFace/Pucker do NOT look sexy at all, you look like a dumb dumb, and EVERYONE laughs at your photos behind your back.

That's all I got at the moment.

Until you read me again...practice random acts of kindness...get in touch with an old friend...and do something different and stick with may be pleased with the results!

Catch you next time...