Friday, October 22, 2010

If I Had A Million Dollars...or Killin' Time on a Friday Afternoon

TGIF Beatdowners!

Quick update on the work-out/bettering myself plan...

Been to the gym 6 out of 7 days per week since I rejoined.  Feeling 100x better.  I'm loving the work-out high.  I find myself challenging myself, too..."One more minute on the treadmill", "Just another quarter-mile", "5 more pounds on this set", etc., etc.  Still a ways to go to get where I want to be, but enjoying the first few weeks!

Quick Halloween costume side bar...

I'm dressing up as Jesus.  I'm hoping He will forgive me.  I'd be willing to bet He was a cool Dude with an awesome sense of humor.  No offense intended.  Just kind of snicker when I think about it.  I'll be posting pics on my Facebook page, I'm sure.  Lord, please forgive me.  I'm an a-hole.

Now then, on to the blog...

The Mega Millions jackpot is up to a staggering $101 million.  That's a MOBYDONKULOUS amount of loot.  I'm buying tickets for it tonight without a doubt.

$101 million.  Could you imagine?  I'd immediately go for the cash option, which I think is in the neighborhood of $70 million.  From everything I've heard/read, you clear about a third of the cash pay-out after taxes, etc.  A third of $70 million is $23,333,333.33.


I'm finding the day is dragging, and I've mentally checked out, so what better way to pass the time than to figure out what to do with that kind of loot...

I won't bore you with the obvious...I'd donate to worthy charities, I'd help family and friends (Tommy J. would get that $0.33), and make sure my 2 Littleheads had a trust fund.

But I'd have some wicked fun, too.  And here is some of what I'd spend recklessly on...

1. I'd rent a sky box at Ravens Stadium for the remaining home games.
2. I'd go to the Super Bowl.
3. I'd by a few new cars...all of them LOADED.  In no particular order: a Ford F350 Crew Cab, black, with a big ol' lift on it...a Black BMW X6...a black Chevy Camero (the new ones)...and an old, fully restored 1970 Chevy Nova
4. I'd buy a personalized jersey for every NFL team...I'd buy the home, away, and alt colors for a few of them, too.
5. I'd buy a bar.  I'd let someone else run it, I'd just bar tend there.
6. I'd buy a big piece of land, and have a log cabin built on it...a big one...a rancher...with an enormous man cave of a basement full of sport memorabilia, a full service bar, a few TVs, including one ginormous one (60+ inch).
7. I'd go to Ireland, Scotland, England, and Germany.
8. I'd buy an RV and do some fun road trips across the country.
9. I'd spend a week in NYC during the Holiday season.
10. I'd go to Vegas.  On a chartered private jet.  'Nuff said.
11. I'd quit my job, and go back to school.  I'd get a minor in Pop Culture Studies from UB, just because (A) pop culture fascinates me, and (B) one of the requirements for the minor is a class about zombies.
12. I would throw a concert on some big-ass farm, sell tickets to it, and throw all proceeds from ticket sales to a children's center/orphanage to ensure a good Christmas for all of the kids there.
13. On Black Friday of this year, I'd wander around and give complete strangers $100 every 30 minutes, and wish them a MERRY CHRISTMAS.  Take that you ACLU fer's.
14. I'd go to a few of my favorite watering holes and pick-up the tabs of the patrons.
15. I'd buy some major beer brewing equipment and a garage and start my own brewery; after someone teaches me how to brew beer on a distributor level.
16. I would sponsor a bar crawl through Federal Hill sometime in December; the catch - you have to dress like Santa, an elf, or Mrs. Claus to participate.
17. I'd buy a condo in Ocean City.
18. I'd start my own wine cellar...just for shits and giggles.
19. I'd get tickets to as many U2 shows for their Summer 2011 North American tour as I could handle - and I'd travel to them in the aforementioned RV.
20. I'd hire Philly J to film me going to bars across Maryland (again in the aforementioned RV - with a hired DD) for a reality TV series a la "Man vs. Food" or "Zane Lamprey's Three Sheets".  It'd be a Direct-to-DVD project.  It'd probably sell 3 copies.  But it would be legendary.  Title TBD...the words STONE and AWESOME would certainly be in the title somewhere.

There's a Top 20...and I'd be willing to bet I haven't even spent $2 million yet. 

It's good to dream.  Especially when you have to kill the remaining 118 minutes left in the work week.

A toast for all of the Beatdowners...

Here's to a long life and a merry one.
A quick death and an easy one.
A pretty girl and an honest one.
A cold beer—and another one!

Bottoms up! 

Until next awesome to each other.  And party on, dudes.

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