Thursday, February 10, 2011

The Bad Mood Blog...or The List of Stuff I Can't Dig

**WARNING** If you are offended by overwhelming negativity, stop reading this entry and go on your hap-hap-happidity doo daa way...

Happy F'ing Thursday, Beatdowners...

I haven't really written a carefree kind of blog in awhile, so I might as well right now...

This will be a dozy because I'm in a suck-ass mood.



I'm just not satisfied.

And I hate February. Lots of bad memories. Too many.

"Hate". That's a strong word. I "REALLY DISLIKE" February.

Anyhow, I'm in a mood. A wicked bad one. And what better way to vent than to blog about stuff I strongly, mildly, and/or obsessively dislike?

In no particular order....

1. I don't like Tuesday's.
2. I don't like February.
3. I don't like cauliflower.
4. I don't like when people say they will do something, or ignore questions and/or requests purposefully to avoid conflict, or what they may perceive to be conflict...if someone asks you something and the answer is "NO CHANCE, BUB", grow a set and say it instead of making the person asking look like a fool, or keeping them around like a little puppy dog for when you are bored or for an ego boost.
5. I don't like pennies.
6. I do not - DO NOT - like the word "moist".
7. I do not like when piss shivers are so strong that you accidentally pee on the wall and the floor rather than in the toilet bowl...c'mon, that can't just be a Stone thing.
8. I do not like when people leave floaters in public rest rooms.
9. I do not like the phrase "ON THE BRIGHT SIDE" real, if you have to say that, chances are sh*t sucks all around.
10. I do not like when people (girls, guys, and anything inbetween) think they are all that and a bag of chips when chances are they are most likely average at best...sure, you may have big boobs, a nice butt, big muscles, money, what have you...but don't be bigger than your britches...chances are you get the time of day because alcohol is involved, someone is looking for a sure thing, or someone has low confidence...these people I refer to are the usual suspects on Facebook who have no shirts on in their profile pic, who have their bikini on in the profile pic, who have booze in their hand in most pics, and/or who wear paint-on tight clothing (that laughably usually shows off their adoration of Big Macs, milkshakes, burritos, and beer in the form of a muffin top or beer gut) and bend over to spill out of their tops or show off their ass(sets).
11. I do not like judging a book by the cover only to find the story inside is a sh*tshow.
12. I do not like ingrown toe nails.
13. I do not like infected hair follicles.
14. I do not like those super small - and SUPER painful - zits you get in the corner of your nose.
15. I do not like Justin Beiber.
16. I do not like missed opportunity.
17. I do not like girls that wear white shoes/loafers and colored socks...I knew this chick in high school that did that...we affectionately called her Puff Socks...and Weedwacker.
18. I do like like quitters...not talking about when someone gives up on something, I'm talking about socks that lose their elasticity at the top and they sag on you all day. F'ing quitters.
19. I do not like treading in dog poop.
20. I do not like when you order food for delivery and you are so psyched for it, and when it gets to your house and is all paid for and the happy little driver is on their way, you open it and it's WRONG.
21. I do not like indecision.
22. I do not like ruts - especially the current one.
23. I do not like being unmotivated.
24. I do not like know, boogers that kinda slide on out there for the world to see - usually at the most inappropriate times.
25. I do not like when women allow douchebags to treat them like dirt and they keep going back for more.
26. I do not like telemarketers.
27. I do not like it when I don't have the winning MegaMillions ticket.
28. I do not like scrapple.
29. I do not like Oil Slicks...but watching the after effects of people doing them is pretty fun, even when it's me ralphing all over the parking lot of Cheeseburger in Paradise.
30. I do not like mistakes I've made...but do like the fact that I've accepted them and risen above does that one even count?
31. I do not like being labeled.
32. I do not like people who see only one side of things...people who refuse to compromise, listen, or accept a difference of opinion.
33. I do not like gutless turds who talk smack behind people's back and won't to someone's face.
34. I do not like being misled.
35. I do not like tequila.
36. I do not like cigars.
37. I do not like my meat well done.
38. I do not like people mispelling every second or third word on their Facebook status...or worse, talking "Urban" when they are most certainly NOT.
39. I do not like jitbags and posers.
40. I do not like the font Wing Dings...seriously, WTF?!?!?!?
41. I do not like emptying the dishwasher.
42. I do not like always picking up the tab.
43. I do not like when people snort back snot...blow your friggin' nose already.
44. I do not like gas stations charging the extra .009 cents per gallon all the time.
45. I do not like lime flavored beer.
46. I do not like Cadberry Eggs.
47. I do not like people who take themselves too seriously.
48. I do not like flat soda.
49. I do not like how political correctness has made everyone so friggin' uptight.
50 I do not like knowing that I'll post this and have another 50 things pop in my head that I shoulda posted.

Ah well.

F it. There is always tomorrow. TGI f'ing F.

Sh*t mood continues. Feel free to leave comments on things you don't like. Or suggestions on how to snap out of this mood...

Until next time...

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